Do you talk about the role technology plays in your relationships — for better or worse? This week, we discuss some of the ways in which technology interferes with connection and explore an important conversation all couples (and singles!) can use to minimize technoference. We also discuss anxiety related to tech and the pandemic, share strategies to change the way we use technology, and answer a listener question about how to respond to a sticky situation with a new beau.

Consider these prompts to start this important conversation:

Exploring Fantasies

1. What environments/locations appeal to you?
2. What roles do you find alluring — for yourself or a partner?
3. What type of porn do you enjoy/not enjoy?
4. What stories turn you on/off?
5. What sounds do you enjoy?
6. What words do you like to hear (or not hear)?
7. Can you recall & describe early experiences of arousal or orgasm?
8. What non-sexual activities excite you?
9. What visual elements do you find arousing and why?
10. Are there scents or tastes that you find sexually arousing?
11. What excites (and/or concerns) you about…BDSM, sex in public, toys, role play, kink, sex clubs, group sex, threesomes, anal play, dirty talk, porn?

Technology 

1. How do you feel the use of tech devices affects your relationship? Be specific.
2. How do you feel about electronics in the bedroom or at the table (or elsewhere)?
3. How often do you want to be connected/disconnected?
4. Why are you drawn to your phone/device?
5. Would you like to reduce your use of technology when you’re together? If so, why?
6. How do you feel when your partner is on their phone in different scenarios/environments (e.g. in bed, at the table, while watching TV, in the car etc.)?
7. What commitments can you make to minimize technoference?
8. How can you use technology to enhance your relationship?

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