In a Perfect World

We don’t live in a perfect world and we never will. The reality of perfection is so out of the realm of possibility; we wouldn’t recognize it if it slapped us on the butt. But I digress, in a perfect world we wouldn’t feel chastised for expressing ourselves as we...

Desire Pearl VS Desire RM

Now let’s start with this; these are both resorts that do not require nudity or even topless patrons. With that said, if you have never gone topless or nude before you may feel comfortable in doing so before you leave the resort. Our first trip was to Desire Pearl, and...

So Many Questions!

Who are other swingers? Where do you find other swingers? Who can we trust? What if we don’t like it? What if only one of us likes the swinging lifestyle? I wish there were a simple, easy solution to answering these questions. The best way to figure these out is...

The Margin of Error in the Lifestyle-Keep it Realistic

In my opinion, we should all have well-defined boundaries. Despite having discussed several scenarios and experiences with our partner, unforeseeable events can and likely, will arise. For instance, close friends of mine have a ‘no kissing’ rule. They do engage in full swap, but they do not kiss other people...

Do ‘Swingers’ Get Jealous?

  Short answer, yes. Those who are in an open relationship will likely experience normal emotional responses. It can happen, jealousy can creep in. Communication is so important. The intentionality may be completely innocent during an explicit experience, but how your partner perceives could be opposite. It is possible to...

Who Needs Consent?

We have all heard the uproar about the importance of getting consent before engaging in any type of physical interaction with another person. Physical interaction could be as aggressive as grabbing, kissing, or as innocent as hugging or conversational touching. No matter the circumstance, nobody has the given right to...

What Motivation?

I speak from my own experience on this topic, as other people may be different than Dave and I. When we entered the lifestyle and decided to open our marriage, we both discovered that we had gravely let ourselves go. We had both stopped working out due to hectic work...

Taking a Break is OK!

Too much of a good thing is not always a good thing. The lifestyle is so exciting when it is new, talk about sensory overload! However, there is a need to reel back to reality regularly. Now that we have some time in the LS under our wing, it is...

We Have Fantasies, but What is ‘Normal’?

Good luck trying to define normal in any relationship. Who is ‘normal’? What in the hell is ‘normal’? Society has put such constraints and judgment on anything that doesn’t fall into a picturesque image of a photo-shopped 2.5 member family, picket fence, and a medium-sized rescue dog. That is not...

How do you find swingers?

Firstly, I usually check under the bed. Ok, seriously. ‘Swingers’ are not that easy to find. There are websites that people can discreetly sign up on to help, like Double Date Nation, but not everyone sets up a profile in the lifestyle. Often people choose to meet others organically; they...