Admin Andi’s Thoughts

How Does a Couple ‘Swing’?

The swinging lifestyle has its challenges. It works well for a secure couple that is sexually uninhibited and curious about expanding their sexual fantasies beyond just their partner. Taking part in this lifestyle will likely be a disaster if both partners are not completely into the idea of it or if there are underlying unresolved issues. The swinging lifestyle is not going to repair a recent heartbreak or transgression within a marriage. The good news is that if your marriage is solid and you have discussed ‘out of the box’ fantasies etc., then this may be sexy option for you to explore. Many couples are unsure how to become ‘swingers,’ it is pretty easy. The best way to find local swingers is by setting up an online profile. An online profile on a secure site like Double Date Nation allows you a safe and secure environment to control your level of privacy. Double Date Nation also gears toward the ‘newbies’ with less aggressive options. If a [...]

Who Needs Consent?

We have all heard the uproar about the importance of getting consent before engaging in any type of physical interaction with another person. Physical interaction could be as aggressive as grabbing, kissing, or as innocent as hugging or conversational touching. No matter the circumstance, nobody has the given right to touch another person without permission. The environment does not alter that rule. If you are at a Lifestyle Club with a person dancing next to you completely naked, you still need to ask permission to touch. Often the situation gets blamed as though the person doing the touching has a right due to it being ‘understood’ and this is not the case. Men get a bad name for this, and it is not always the men that are not getting the proper consent. Yes, ladies, you need to ask permission too. A friend of mine told me the story of being at a dinner party, and there was a combination of local lifestyle couples and vanilla couples. The vanilla [...]

What Motivation?

I speak from my own experience on this topic, as other people may be different than Dave and I. When we entered the lifestyle and decided to open our marriage, we both discovered that we had gravely let ourselves go. We had both stopped working out due to hectic work schedules and paid no attention to our diets. I did not take the time to dress up super sexy like I did when we first got together. We became comfortable, as many people do. The world of metaphoric ‘elastic waistbands and house shoes’ were becoming not just our norm, but the preference for the majority of the time. In my mind, we were past the courting or honeymoon phase. The excitement and spark had faded some, and now this was what normal people do. I have never really grouped myself in with the definition of ‘normal,’ I think most people I know would agree. We found ourselves participating in the daily grind, get up go to work, come home, [...]

Taking a Break is OK!

Too much of a good thing is not always a good thing. The Lifestyle is so exciting when it is new,  talk about sensory overload! However, there is a need to reel back to reality regularly. Now that we have some time in the LS under our wing, it is easy for us to spot ‘newbies gone loco’ because we did the same thing. If you are not careful, the ultra-energy and excitement can wear on your partner and your relationship. It can feel like a drug or that high that you experienced when you first met your partner. You may experience excitement, the feeling of wanting to be the best you can be. You will find yourself motivated to eat right, hit the gym and groom like you haven’t done in years. All of these things are positive, but you should be cautious not to let it outshine your relationship. This is something new, but it does not replace what you already have and love. Make sure know [...]

By |2019-07-18T17:47:42+00:00June 24th, 2019|Swinger Lifestyle, Swingers|0 Comments

We Have Fantasies, but What is ‘Normal’?

Good luck trying to define normal in any relationship. Who is ‘normal’? What in the hell is ‘normal’? Society has put such constraints and judgment on anything that doesn’t fall into a picturesque image of a photo-shopped 2.5 member family, picket fence, and a medium-sized rescue dog. That is not real life. Some may like to attempt to conform to that image and find acceptance from society; I imagine that most find misery in trying to achieve it. Ultimately, I think that trying to play a part and act happy is a fantasy within itself. We all have sexual fantasies, brains, and sex organs. With the combination of those three things, we are doomed to ever be just like anybody else. Fetishes, fantasies, and even just risqué thoughts are a lot more fun when you have a trusted partner, with whom you can share them. Being able to open up to Dave was the most freeing year of my life. No judgment, just the ability to be human. We [...]

What is a Swinger?

The age-old question, or not. What is a swinger exactly? The stigma of the word ‘swinger’ takes many people back to the 1960s and 1970s where free love was ‘in style’ as if it were a phase. This term turns this turns a lot of people off. Some people refer to the ‘lifestyle’ or the ‘swinging scene’ or just the ‘scene.’ There is no incorrect way to address it. The term ‘monogamish’ has become popular as well as consensual non-monogamy or ethical non-monogamy. Whatever you choose to call it, it is something that has always been going on and seems to be trending up in popularity. There is no way to tell if that because more people are doing it or more people are just being honest about doing it. People tend to keep the utmost discretion while engaging in these types of open relationships. Essentially a swinger is a couple that engages in sexual activity with people outside of their monogamous relationship but typically together. This can include [...]

How do you find swingers?

Great question! Firstly, I usually check under the bed. Ok, seriously. Swingers are not easy to find. We have multiple apps and websites that people can discreetly sign up on to help, but not everyone sets up a profile in the lifestyle. Some people choose to meet others organically; they don’t want to compromise their discretion for anything. Some people don’t like the term ‘lifestyle’ or ‘swingers’; they prefer to call it an open relationship or consensual non-monogamy. Other people could care less what you call it, they are just glad to be there! It is sad that we have to hide behind a veil of ‘normal’ to live out our fantasies in our own privacy. Any-who, back to how does one find other swingers? If you choose to search organically, you may have your work cut out for you. It will help to start with having a very outgoing personality. You can look for the ‘symbols’ of swingers like the black rings worn on the right hand, or [...]

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